In praise of … Len Doyle

18 12 2013
He doesn't exactly look like a golfing god, does he?

He doesn’t exactly look like a golfing god, does he?

The above is a picture of Len Doyle, golfing god. I have absolutely no idea what he’s doing. A possible explanation is that he’s so upset with his tee shot that he’s actually throwing up all over it, but that is mere conjecture. He could be just staring at the ball, willing it to take up a better lie. Or it could be part of some strange pre-shot routine. Whatever’s going on, it’s hard to see a birdie in Lennie’s immediate future.

The truth is, of course, that in terms of pure golfing ability Len is not god-like at all. I remember when we were both 10 handicaps. We’ve both got worse; he’s just got worse quicker than I have and now masquerades as a 20+ handicap. But golfing skill is not what lies behind Len’s status as a golfing deity. Every Saturday of the year, come rain or shine, Len organises the Men’s Morning competition at Glacier Greens. Some weeks, in the depths of winter, there may be barely thirty hardy souls who venture out onto the rain sodden or near frozen links; in the height of summer there could be way over 100 entries. Either way, Len is usually in the pro shop before the first group of the day tees off, in order to help collect entry fees,  money for snips, Pot of Gold etc, and he’s always in the clubhouse at the end of the day to collect all the score cards. At that point he and his faithful associate, Rick ‘the Beaker’ Verbeek, sort the players into flights according to handicap, check every score to determine the gross and net winners in each flight along with the snip and Pot of Gold winners, and email out all the results, usually by the following morning. They also enter every score into the computer, having deducted strokes according to the mysterious Equitable Stroke Control scoring system, to ensure that players’ handicaps are up to date for the following week.

Every spring Glacier Greens holds its infamous three week Shoot Out, for which Len and his team have been collecting prizes throughout the year so that every entrant, right down to the last duffer, gets a steak barbecue and a prize worth in excess of their entry fee. ‘Best prize table on Vancouver Island’, the team are proud to say. And finally, there’s the Memorial Bridge between the 15th green and the 16th tee box, with plaques commemorating every member who has passed away in the last dozen years or so. Sad to say, it’s going to have to be a double decker bridge before too long.

And what does Len receive for all this hard work, I hear you ask? Free membership? Special playing privileges? A coveted parking spot near the practice green? The answer is, of course, nothing – which is pretty much as Len wants it. He does these things because he loves our club, and feels that things like Saturday Men’s play and the Shoot Out and the memorial bridge are worth fighting for. It is for this reason that many of the members consider him the heart and soul of Glacier Greens Golf Club – a true golfing god.

This is not to say that Len is an English grammar god. I’m a retired language teacher,  and Lennie’s somewhat undisciplined approach to spelling and totally random use of apostrophes has been a constant cause of pain to me. I used to email him regularly in an attempt to get him to stop writing “Morning Lad’s” at the start of each email, but eventually I realised that my emails just encouraged him. I can only assume that correct apostrophisation was not considered a priority by his previous employer, the RCMP, although this could be just one more reason why Lennie never became Chief Commissioner.

Despite this, and the fact that he has an annoying ability to have the last word in nearly all our ‘discussions’, I would like to submit this post in praise of one of the best supporters (or “supporter’s” , as Len would write it) that Glacier Greens will ever have.

All da best, Lennie!

Dave B.

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14 responses

18 12 2013
BHD

He’s a beauty! Always enjoyed my conversations with Len – a real gem.

18 12 2013
Bagger Dave

He certainly is, Ben. One of life’s good guys, for sure.

18 12 2013
Ross Dowe

Lenny is indeed the “heart and soul” of GGGC. I wouldn’t be opposed to Lenny getting a life membership for all his efforts he has put in.

Ross Dowe

18 12 2013
Bagger Dave

That’s a great idea, Ross. I wonder how you go about such a thing?

18 12 2013
theweiner@telus.net

Well done Dave, as I could not agree more !! But don’t tell LLD that I said that.

18 12 2013
Bagger Dave

Your secret is safe with me, Wayne. He’d never believe it anyway!

18 12 2013
PG the SBer

I agree wholeheartedly EXCEPT, at times, Len can be a cruel and vicious man (we all have our weaknesses). To march into the clubhouse and announce that “the pot of gold is #17” when, in fact he knew full well that it was #7 and the happiness of the Parsons Xmas was dependent on this fact, does amount to a pimple on an otherwise flawless façade.
Other than this unfortunate, isolated incident, praise that has been well earned.
Lennie, you da best

18 12 2013
Bagger Dave

You’re absolutely right, Glennie. A cruel trick indeed and, as you know, I still haven’t got over the incident. Probably one of his RCMP torture techniques…

18 12 2013
popeyeandjane@shaw.ca

Thank you so much Dave, Ben, Ross and the Weiner. You lad’s are very kind. And David, thanks for your words and for joining my Saturday Morning committee. A welcome addition to the team. Other than you and Adrian Haut joining me this year I have had the same committee for fourteen years. As long as I continue to enjoy what I am doing, continue to have the support from the Saturday Men’s players and keep my name “OFF” the Memorial Bridge I plan on hanging in as I like what I see for the future with Colonel Glenn Watters looking after the N.P.S. side of things and our new president Mark Kierstead looking after our Club. ” Things are looking real good for the future of the Glacier Greens Golf Club ” P.S. Even with a plus twenty handicap I have not seen my name on the prize list since August 2013. .

18 12 2013
Bagger Dave

You deserve all the kind words, Lennie. As for your handicap – I never said you were a sandbagger, just that you’re not very good…

19 12 2013
Bud Bryan

Lennie You are the best at what you do, as a leader, friend and co-worker.
I have had so much fun working & playing with you throughout the years. I for one
would vote you as man of the year, must be hard for Jane to get any work from you @ home. But I am willing to buy you a Rum @ Coke, as a Thank-you
for what you have done for me and GGGC. Merry Christmas from my family to yours.

19 12 2013
Bagger Dave

Blimey, Bud! Very touching. Can I have a rum and coke too, please?

20 12 2013
Barry

I would like to reiterate the comments above and add a huge thank you for all your dedication toward our golf course. I only speak for myself, but I would not be a member if Saturday mornings didn’t exist. I really enjoy the competition and look forward to it. I can’t believe Bud is buying drinks, now we can work on Dave. We know that teachers still have one dollar bills in their wallet. Again thank you…..Cheers Barry

20 12 2013
Bagger Dave

Actually, Barry, I’ve already told Len I’ll be buying him a drink on Sunday. A coffee. Small, obviously.

Dave

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